~real men don’t abuse women~
In actual fact,
- yep, they fucking do
- being a real man is associated with masculinity, and masculinity fuels violence against women, so yes again men abuse women
- campaigns like this prioritise the preservation of masculinity before the safety of women
Here’s another version: Boy meets girl. Boy decides he’s in love with girl. Boy chases girl. Girl says she’s not interested. Boy keeps chasing her. Girl says she’s still not interested. Boy keeps grinding away at her. She still says ‘no.’ Boy rapes girl. Girl falls in love with boy. They are happily swept away on a wave of romance.
And another: Boy meets girl. Boy decides he’s in love with girl. Boy chases girl. Girl says she’s not interested. Boy keeps chasing her. Girl says she’s still not interested. Boy keeps grinding away at her. She still says ‘no.’ Boy murders girl and is filled with manpain and regret, but she deserved it for being frigid.
Truth, or fiction?
All three of these scenarios play out more or less constantly in pop culture, with some variations — the first might as well be Twilight, while the second describes any number of rape-romances produced by the dozens every day, and the third scenario plays out all too frequently in pop culture as well. But they’re also closely mirrored by events in real life — that first scenario in particular is viewed as a highly romantic one, and in some cases as a relationship ideal, something girls should be excited about, something boys should strive for.
I decided to make this post after a morning watching Freema’s first episode of Confidential. I am a huge fan of Freema and Martha is my favourite companion by miles. I didn’t watch it with the intention of getting this fired up, but I found myself stunned by the difference of approach I was seeing as I watched.
Moffat’s era of Who is far too sexist, heteronormative and non-inclusive to be particularly enjoyable to me, but it really struck me, watching RTD and his team talk about Martha with such love and excitement, that the role of the companion really has changed since RTD left.
I feel the companion has become too much of a side-kick, too much of an accessory, as opposed to the main character, our gateway into the Doctor’s magical world, our link with the beauty and potential of humanity even in the most awful situations.
I realise not everyone will agree with me, and I’m not saying you have to, but I’ve collected some quotes together to emphasise what I think is the toxic difference in the approach of each showrunner in their writing and presenting of the companion, and why we have such an issue with women in Doctor Who at the moment.
differences between RTD and Moffat starkly illustrated
The Notorious Wee and Dumpy Interview
Those people who believe Steven Moffat is not sexist, really do need to see this interview and take note.
When he talks about Matt Smith, it’s all about the acting, the charisma, the aura. The whole package. He clearly thinks Matt is smashing and even talks about how in the audition process, Matt wowed him so much he decided to go for a young Doctor instead of an older one.
In contrast, everything he says about Karen is based on her looks. He describes how disappointed he was when he thought she was ‘wee and dumpy’ and then how relieved he felt when he saw she was actually tall and pretty.
Sexism isn’t always an out and out hatred of women. Sometimes it can be in an outlook, in the way people think, and the way people express those thoughts.
I know Moffat means no harm by this, in fact, he clearly believes he is complimenting Karen by talking about her good looks. But the fact remains that the male cast member is appreciated for his talent, and the female cast member (who is sitting right beside him) is appreciated for her looks.
It’s a double standard, and very disrespectful. Certainly, it’s a worrying attitude for the showrunner of one of the most popular and iconic shows to grace British television.
Song for Ten
requested by anonymous
Let’s get a headcount here ladies.
Growing up and even now I have learned in depth about wild animals and other creatures. But when I learned about farm animals and other commonly eaten animals I was taught “milk comes from cows!” “chickens lay eggs!” very basic facts about how we consume and use them. When really these animals are so interesting and are not just “dumb” or “food” animals. People disconnect themselves from these animals so they feel less guilty when eating them.
And some fish use tools :)